Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Some Thoughts Gathered While Hurtling Through the Air at High Speeds In a Large Tin Can



  • Just this morning there was an article in the Vancouver Sun about being more understanding of screaming babies on airplanes, and I’ve been trying to take it to heart. My regular intolerance is being displaced by the warm glow of human compassion.
However......
The screaming kid 2 rows up is clearly 3 or 4 years old, and thus does not qualify as a baby. No, it is just a snot-nosed brat who needs to stop blubbering.
The other 2 screaming kids get a pass, they’re actual babies.
  • It’s interesting that I’m surrounded by a triumvirate of aural terrorists (can I type terrorist while I’m on a plane?), I’m wondering if I’ll be encountering a lot of 3’s on this journey.
  • If you’re ever in an emergency and need all humour and laughter banished instantly, ‘Dinner For Schmucks’ will do the job. Guaranteed. Sheesh.
  • As I grow exhausted of being on this plane after only 4 hours, my mind turns to the 25 consecutive hours I’ll spend on the Hound in 5 days. I think I can safely file that plan under ‘Things That Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time’.
  • As the overgrown baby continues his reign of terror, I balance my annoyance with the pleasure I get from exchanging ‘Kill Me Now’ looks with my fellow victims.
  • Also pleasurable are the fake smiles everyone gives the Parents of the Year when they try to get down the aisle. The aisle being blocked by little Damien.